I remember watching an Oprah show one day when "empty nest syndrome" hit me like most moms when their kids leave,. I was a little emotional and, of course, sad. Then i tuned into her show on this very subject - "empty nest syndrome." We all sat there crying, me in my office in California - and the guests there on Oprah's set. Kind of silly. But empty nest is a real thing.
You look so forward to having those beautiful children as soon as you get married. Even with performing as a major operatic soloist in Utah, I always wanted to be married and have lots of children. I anticipated every birth. As a mom you get those children through their "terrible two's", see them go off the school, watch them get blessed, baptized, confirmed, receive the Priesthood as young men, and awards as young women, then support them with all of their sports, piano lessons, music projects, and help them with school projects, spelling bee's, school exams, science fair projects, make costumes for Halloween, etc. You stay up all night with them when they are sick, clean up their messes, wash loads and loads of smelly sports clothing, decorate the house to nine's for holidays, cook for four days for Thanksgiving, make a different cookie all month of December, decorated for birthday parties, drive them everywhere, and the list goes on and on. Memories are made daily, weekly, monthly and yearly. You laugh with them, cry with them, hold them, snuggle them, and suddenly they leave for missions, college, get married and start having children of their own. But you do always hope that they live close by so you can continue being a big part of their lives, and the lives of their wonderful children.
At this writing, Ben and his wife, Cooper, live in the State College area of PA with five beautiful children. Chris and wife, Lesa, live in Utah (and all over the world with pro basketball) with their three beautiful girls. Josh and wife, Ashleigh live in Utah where Josh is finishing up at BYU, with two children. But I was OK because I had my daughter, Angela, her husband, Eddie and their five fabulous girls here - within 5 minutes of my home! But that all changed last week. They moved to Utah. And although I'm thrilled that Eddie got a great new job, and happy they found a 5 bedroom home with a big yard, I'm a little sad. You see, when I needed my weekly "grandma fix," I could have Angela bring her girls over so we could play paper dolls, Barbie's, animals, puzzles, set up the pop-up tent next to my desk, feed the ducks from the deck, along with the turtles, walk scooter around the lake ... just be together.
I do miss them very much. I miss their fingerprints everywhere. I miss them dropping things into the lake off the deck. I miss them breaking things. I miss them getting into my makeup. I miss them spilling Scooter's dog food all over my floors as they were feeding the Coy fish. I miss them dragging Scooter all over the house. I miss them belting out "Tomorrow!" at the top of their voices, competing with each other. I miss them combing my hair into strange tangled styles. I miss them rummaging through my purse looking for gum. I miss it all. They were my personal "snuggles" that I needed during every week to give me a much needed break from biz. They balanced my life with working non stop.
So, to keep on a positive note, I'm thankful for the special time I had with them. I'm also thankful for Skype, cell phones, computers, any communication tool I have access to in this wonderful day and age where I can see and talk to them. And, I'm thankful for the time we did spend together, and wish I had taken more days off to just "hang" with them. But, as I've adapted key phrases over the years to keep me always moving foward, "onward and upward", "it is what it is," "next!" and it's "all good." And I do look foward to adding more road trips to Utah and PA this year to see them all. Maybe we need to relocate. Who knows?
